Who do you want me to be?
I loved Mr Benn when I was a kid and thought it was great to be able to try on a new costume and be someone else for a while, but a lot of people have carried that idea into their adult life and find themselves trying so hard to fit into another costume that they forget to enjoy being themselves too
While learning about astrology and how it works with the chakras I came across a pattern that always seemed to be in those who had either shaggy sun, moon or ascendant in their birth charts. Shaggy would be associated with the third eye so it made complete sense to me that it was a case of them intuiting what others wanted and blindly responding to those unexpressed wishes rather than stop and question whether it was what they themselves wanted to be or do.
I have dated a few people with the shaggy influence and as sweet as it can be to have someone respond to your wishes before you even spoke them the down side is they do it for everyone else too so there comes a time when you wonder who are they or more importantly who do they want to be.
The shaggy influence turned out to be only a part of the pattern, every one of them also had a blocked Heart chakra so deep down they had a feeling that they were not enough in themselves and so had to try that little harder or go that extra mile to get the love and recognition that seemed to come so easily to others. But all their effort seemed to do was make them more and more unhappy and feeling unworthy. To me it’s because their focus is pointed in the wrong direction. To seek approval and acceptance from others when deep down you neither approve nor accept yourself is pretty pointless, so it makes sense to me to begin with ourselves and learns to accept our whole selves.
An imbalance in the heart and third eye can make us miserable when its blocked and when its open we seem determined to make others miserable. An open heart chakra has no concept of how others feel and when challenged about their behaviour or attitude they will insist that they were hurt more like it’s some kind of competition or that they only hurt us because we hurt them as in tit for tat. An open heart lacks emotional maturity and would be like dealing with a petulant 3 year old when you have to discuss your feelings and needs. It’s all about them, but we have to accept that our blocked hearts gives them permission to remain selfish and self absorbed.
So if we want things to change we have to be the first change and stop trying to be what others want us to be and instead begin to become who we want us to be.
It turns out that this pattern is not just in those with the shaggy influence, it was just easier to see in them. We all have some aspect of ourselves that we are unwilling or afraid to accept and depending on whether we respond in the open heart chakra way were we judge others and their failings (while ignoring and refusing to see our own) or with a blocked heart we look out at others believing them to be somehow more special, deserving, talented, clever, wise or important to the point where we use it to put ourselves down and believe ourselves to be incapable of ever being good enough.
So if you ever feel yourself trying to figure out what others want you to be, slam on the breaks and rephrase your question and ask yourself
"Who do I want to be?"
I loved Mr Benn when I was a kid and thought it was great to be able to try on a new costume and be someone else for a while, but a lot of people have carried that idea into their adult life and find themselves trying so hard to fit into another costume that they forget to enjoy being themselves too
While learning about astrology and how it works with the chakras I came across a pattern that always seemed to be in those who had either shaggy sun, moon or ascendant in their birth charts. Shaggy would be associated with the third eye so it made complete sense to me that it was a case of them intuiting what others wanted and blindly responding to those unexpressed wishes rather than stop and question whether it was what they themselves wanted to be or do.
I have dated a few people with the shaggy influence and as sweet as it can be to have someone respond to your wishes before you even spoke them the down side is they do it for everyone else too so there comes a time when you wonder who are they or more importantly who do they want to be.
The shaggy influence turned out to be only a part of the pattern, every one of them also had a blocked Heart chakra so deep down they had a feeling that they were not enough in themselves and so had to try that little harder or go that extra mile to get the love and recognition that seemed to come so easily to others. But all their effort seemed to do was make them more and more unhappy and feeling unworthy. To me it’s because their focus is pointed in the wrong direction. To seek approval and acceptance from others when deep down you neither approve nor accept yourself is pretty pointless, so it makes sense to me to begin with ourselves and learns to accept our whole selves.
An imbalance in the heart and third eye can make us miserable when its blocked and when its open we seem determined to make others miserable. An open heart chakra has no concept of how others feel and when challenged about their behaviour or attitude they will insist that they were hurt more like it’s some kind of competition or that they only hurt us because we hurt them as in tit for tat. An open heart lacks emotional maturity and would be like dealing with a petulant 3 year old when you have to discuss your feelings and needs. It’s all about them, but we have to accept that our blocked hearts gives them permission to remain selfish and self absorbed.
So if we want things to change we have to be the first change and stop trying to be what others want us to be and instead begin to become who we want us to be.
It turns out that this pattern is not just in those with the shaggy influence, it was just easier to see in them. We all have some aspect of ourselves that we are unwilling or afraid to accept and depending on whether we respond in the open heart chakra way were we judge others and their failings (while ignoring and refusing to see our own) or with a blocked heart we look out at others believing them to be somehow more special, deserving, talented, clever, wise or important to the point where we use it to put ourselves down and believe ourselves to be incapable of ever being good enough.
So if you ever feel yourself trying to figure out what others want you to be, slam on the breaks and rephrase your question and ask yourself
"Who do I want to be?"